Screw doing what you love, start loving what you do

Is the widespread "do what you love" advice any good? It's not, you should start somewhere else.

If you're a bit of a reader you often come across posts on all kinds of media stating that you need to chase your dreams, find your passion and do what you love. Because of everyone telling everyone else this is what they need to do you start believing it. You start reflecting and realizing you are not there yet. You might start becoming less positive about your current situation. Social media is also destructive since people only post the good stuff, not the bad moments in life. Everyone around you is happier, more successful then you, right?

While chasing your dreams is what you definitely should be doing, let's start somewhere else; screw doing what you love as the top goal, start with loving what you do first and move on from there. Let explain why.

As a person, and more specific as a gen - y (read this, it's awesome: http://waitbutwhy.com/2013/09/why-generation-y-yuppies-are-unhappy.html) we are taught that the sky is the limit, we can do much better then our peers, and we are special. We can rule the world, become the next president or whatnot. Having this belief will make you feel like you are missing out one way or another, constantly. Being in need of more or having the feeling the grass is greener somewhere else - which in this case would be doing what you love - you will always be chasing something and not happy with the current situation, have the feeling like you are stuck.

By deepening your knowhow on what you are currently doing you will find more pleasure in what you are doing right now. You are responsible for developing you own knowledge and expertise, don't blame anyone else for your lack of training. By taking this serious and investing some time and money you will become a more valuable sparring partner, a better asset to your employer and more empowered simply because you have your facts straight. Isn't this a much more fruitful soil for growth?

Living in a full-time daydream of a sense that there is more and you aren't there yet has an interestingly nasty side effect; we forget to be in the here and now. While you are busy attempting doing what you love your loved ones grow up, grow old and sometimes leave us abruptly. By focusing less on "what could be" and more on what is happening here and now we enjoy life more. While I think the word has gotten a bit fluffy lately this is what one might call mindfulness.

The ones who really have the feeling they still need to change drastically after reading to the bottom or are just plain genuinely unhappy, I also have some advice for these people. Ask yourself, will something as vague inconceivable as doing what you love really solve the actual reason you unhappy, and do you even really know what you will love about doing what you love? Or are there other things at the basis of your structural unhappiness? You also have to understand that like a good wine, things such as finding what you love will take time and won't happen overnight. You have to be in it for the long run. And maybe if you need to think so deeply to find it, isn't it just hiding in plain sight?

Think twice next time you get that awry feeling when reading doing what you love praise. Start where you should; loving what you do.

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